White Horse

Say you're sorry
That face of an angel
Comes out just when you need it to
As I paced back and forth all this time
Cause I honestly believed in you
Holding on The days drag on Stupid girl,
I should have known, I should have known

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you
And your white horse, to come around

Baby I was naive,
Got lost in your eyes
And never really had a chance
I had so many dreams
About you and me
Happy endings
Now I know

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet,
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you
And your white horse, to come around

And there you are on your knees,
Begging for forgiveness,
begging for me
Just like I always wanted
but I'm sooo sorry

Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm gonna find someone someday who might actually treat me well
This is a big world, that was a small town
There in my rearview mirror disappearing now
And its too late for you and your white horse
Now its too late for you and your white horse,
to catch me now

Let me let go baby...

Let me let go baby, Let me let go.

FUCK YOU.

A little overdue...

So this post may be a little overdue but in lue of writing it I am excited/irked.

It has been one year one month and 8 eight days since my attempted suicide. Facts say that 65% of teenagers who attempy suicide will attempt in within one year after their first attempt, I am not one of those 65%.

Today yes, I do feel stronger. Has my life changed? Yes at least in some ways. I still have ups and I still have downs, but it has been a matter of how I have learned how to handle my downs.

Dan was what I thought was my rebound guy, but he is still a constant in my life, which is very good. Brandon is now back in my life, but as a friend now. I didn't honestly think we could ever get to that point, but I am so glad we did.

How long?

How long will it take for me to gain enough self respect to let go?



Yeah, I wish I knew the answer too.

Long Gone

It’s so like you just to show up at my door
And act like nothin’s happened
You think I’ll sweep my heart up off the floor
And give it to you
Like so many times before
You’re talking to a stranger
I’m not that girl anymore

That girl is long gone
Boy you missed the boat it just sailed away
Long gone
She’s not drowning in her yesterdays
Betcha never thought I’d be that strong
Well this girl is long gone

Don’t waste your breath with baby baby please
Cuz I am so not listening
Don’t bother getting down upon your knees and try to beg me
I’m tired of how you twist the truth
You’re not talking to the same girl
Who used to forgive you

Gone like the wind under Superman’s cape
Like a thief in the night I made the great escape
I’m not the kind of girl that keeps making the same mistakes

Things that make me smile lately...

Having Brandon back in my life, even if it is only as friends :)

Blaring loud music in the car

Dancing

Smoking Hookah

Bob's Boathouse :)

Sleeping in